Remember When I Said…

…well now that I’ve had a break and had time to think about it, I’ve changed my mind about quitting blogging but I am making a change to the way I use this blog. I have a lot of photos I’ve been hoarding from here, there and everywhere, and I’ve been taking inspiration from other writers, bloggers and photographers so will be focusing more on putting words with pictures than pictures with words.

There won’t be any rhyme or reason behind it, there won’t be any schedule, there won’t be any theme, there won’t be any pressure, there will just be as when I can .

Time to start a new journey.

above the clouds

 

Why I’m Quitting Blogging

 

IMG_20161022_230500

I’ve been having a bit of a dilemma lately, I need to make cut backs in certain areas so that I can get more time for others! This is the problem when you have so many interests and two businesses to run! Well I say two, I really need to find time for my second one that I’m trying to set up. I made some much needed charges to my vintage selling business to free up some time but it’s not enough, I need to make more cut backs elsewhere.

This has been playing on my mind a bit for the last few months and as much as I love blogging, it seems I don’t love it enough to keep in on the stay list. I have been blogging since early 2009, I’ve never been a very dedicated blogger, it’s waxed and waned over the years, over the last few months the urge to blog seems to be waning and trying to keep up is becoming a chore. I never wanted to be a professional blogger, I definitely fall into the hobbyist catagory so not keeping up in the blogging loop has never really bothered me that much. But i do still enjoy reading other people’s blogs.

August is always a good time for reflection, things slow down in the summer for business as everyone is a way and it frees up time to do a little reevaluating of things. I feel that I’m spreading myself to thinly these days  and with so much to keep up with am a) only producing half arsed worked and b) not getting enough personal time in. So I’m cutting back and refocusing that energy into projects that require it especially my new shop, I’m so far behind its silly! So that means I’m putting the blog on hiatus for a while maybe forever. I like writing and want to also focus on some creative pieces that have been languishing in a pile and if I choose between writing a blog or writing a novel, i think I’ll give the novel a go.

I’ve enjoyed blogging (most of the time) but now I feel is the time to let it go and move on as my heart really isn’t invested in it anymore. Maybe one day it will again but for now I’m concentrating on other things. I’m toying with turning this site into more of a professional portfolio and keeping the blog as an archive but there are so many things going on over the next few months, I’ll come to that decision later.

August Goals

Sunbeams

July again was work, work, work on the old shop and so yet again although attempts were made, goals were not met. In other news I’ve made some changes to the vintage shop and what is being stocked which will hopefully free up not only time but space as well in my time work room.

Speaking of making space, the great summer clear out is almost done and dusted. We made massive headway of clearing stuff out, lots of broken and unusable stuff went to the recycling centre, a batch of stuff went to the charity shop and bunch of stuff was sold on ziffit and eBay. I still have some stuff to list on ebay and also sort the CD collection and then that is done. So the flat is feeling a lot less cluttered. I still have some stuff to scan and sort out but feeling like a conquered a small mountain. So all in all things got done which is an achievement, so not feeling so bad about not getting through other stuff, swings and roundabouts and all that jazz.

August is traditionally a quiet business month, everyone is holiday so I usually do my Christmas and Halloween prep. I’m not even sure if I’m going to do a Christmas range this year, I have bought some new supplies to make some smaller pieces to tide me over whilst I work on designing and finishing the bigger pieces. I’m tying to keep a streamlined and slightly more branded approach but to be honest I’m not sure that is my strong point but I will keep at it. I still have loads of supplies to use up despite the streamlining and declutter but it’s no longer overwhelming so that’s another bonus.

halloween supplies

As for setting goals, the main one to slow down a little and refocus on work life balance. I really have fallen out of the habit of making and sewing and I miss it a lot. I get that sometimes you need to focus on one area more in order to get other stuff done later but I’ve spent way more time on it than I intended. It’s easy to fall into a habit of working all the hours under the sun and moon when you’re self-employed and I’m really trying to implement a more structured working day and week, like I would have if I still worked for someone else. Personal time is essential when freelancing and all too often it gets pushed aside because of the fear that the work will dry up. So as things are slower in the summer, it makes sense to enjoy the quietness whilst you can before the busiest season of the year starts (well for those of us who work in retail/e-tail that is).

I’ve occasionally been knitting in the evenings but most of my work day has been taken up with the vintage shop, which is fine because it brings me in money but I’m limiting my time on it to two days a week, three to four days on the handmade shop and the rest is personal time. Obviously I can be flexible when needs be but for me August has always been about enjoying summer and celebrating birthdays. So many people I know are born in August, me I’ll be turning 40 towards the end of the month. I’ll be writing more about that later.

penny dress

Anyway back to goals, so August’s goal is to chill out a bit, finish organising our trip to Canada, flights are booked but need to book accommodation and look into what to do whilst there. I also want to catch up on some sewing and work on my wardrobe etc and also spend more time dedicated to blogging and writing. I’ll be making a few tiny tweaks to the blog over the summer but instead of just saying I will write about style, making clothes etc I will start publishing these drafts I’ve been working on (once I’ve taken pictures). The blog will be focusing more on style and clothes, something I’ve been meaning to do for a while and have dabbled in in the past but it’s still way out of my comfort zone but it’s time to step out of the comfort zone.

So August won’t be concentrating on specific goals like reading a certain amount of books or finishing a certain number of projects but more gearing up to setting better habits, finding time to do things, going on mini adventures, slowing down, relaxing, refocusing recharging and enjoying the rest of the summer.

snail

You Can’t Sit With Us!

cantsitquote

Sometimes you will come across people who just don’t want to engage with you and you know what? You just have to accept that because not everyone is going to like you or want to be your friend but there seems to be an increasing amount of people getting way above their station on social media and acting like they are way better than everyone else and selective with who they talk to.

Whilst in the most part many people are nice, chat, mind their business and do their own thing, there is that bunch that ruin it for everyone else. There is not a week that goes by where there is not some drama or another in the blogging community. I’ve been blogging since 2009, I have never really taken it seriously or been that committed and that’s the great thing about choices but there is a reason why blogging is never going to be taken as a serious professional due to the lack of professionalism that some people display and not just bloggers but also the PR firms and brands they work with.

As it get’s more competitive, the claws get sharper. I won’t lie, I’m not a fan of the term girl gang that gets banded about, I find it to be quite a toxic term and problamtic, I get that the majority of bloggers are females but the term initially comes off quite exclusive. I know they say everyone is welcome but the name suggests otherwise. What starts off as a small community of support and camaraderie, soon gets infected as it grows bigger and it only takes one person to infect the pool and then it all kicks off and as always it’s only a select few that ruin for everyone else, those that are faux and just out to gain something usually for free. or people complain about being left out out because someone else is getting more attention etc, etc, etc.

I’m not a fan of this whole follow for a follow bullshit, it makes absolutely no sense to me! What is the point of having so many followers when hardly any of them interact with you. It’s no big secret that to be successful you have to engage, you are not a rock star, you don’t get to be all aloof and mysterious, you need to interact and engage with people and I’m not just talking hitting a like button to acknowledge their presence! Feeling popular and actually being popular are two different things. Of course the more popular you are the more jealous people will try to take you down and steal your crown from you, which is in part why I’m glad I’m not popular and in other part because I’m too lazy to deal with this shit and I have enough to keep me busy not to need these kind of dramas.

I understand (not from experience) to keep up and interact with lots of followers must be hard but some just comes across as downright rude and of course you don’t have to follow them, though I feel that there is some unwritten obligation to follow people who follow you but again that’s bullshit. It’s called social media not anti social media, if you’re there just to validate your own worth and feel popular due to high numbers then frankly my dear, you’re doing it all wrong. You might pay them a compliment or answer a question they put forward and they don’t respond or even acknowledge it anyway, not even through a like or a thank you but you know that’s also their right, they don’t owe you anything, just like you don’t owe them anything. Chalk it up, move on and find someone who does care.

I get that social media is all about the freedom of speech and everyone is entitled to share their opinion, if you’ve ever followed my twitter feed, you know that I do that a lot (more than I probably should!) but that doesn’t mean people need to respond. If I don’t like something I more often than not just keep scrolling or if really disagree with someone’s opinion I unfollow (usually because they’re a racist bellend). I’ve always been the proverbial outsider even when it comes to the internet. I always seem to be behind on all the popular sites and everyone has already set up their groups, going on meet ups and whatnot and it can be hard to try to integrate without feeling like your gate crashing. Social media is a highly contradictory and volatile ecosystem, sometimes you don’t want to be the one that upsets the balance. But there are tonnes of lovely and welcoming people out there, you will find them and they will find you.

I started blogging like most people did because I could and also as a place to share my opinions and that is just what most of social media is people sharing their opinions, bad comes with good and all that but it’s up to you how you respond to it. Your blog is your blog, you can do whatever you want with it, follow your own path, be you but be the best you that you can be but remember you are human and you are allowed to falter. You are allowed to have your own opinion, you don’t have to follow the pack all the time, stop trying to be someone else because they look popular, looks are deceptive, stats are just numbers, just because someone has 10k followers doesn’t mean they are rich and successful. The internet is just a snapshot, a photograph, you have no idea what is going on outside the frame, more importantly just try and not be a total dick! By all means disagree with people, no one is telling you to lick arse but there is no reason to be a total jerk to someone whose life and livelihood has taken a turn for the worse. You can just jog on and not give you’re two pence worth and on that note that is my two pence worth!

PS this is just my opinion, it doesn’t make me right.

The Problem With Social Media

 

IMG_20160623_213315

I’m kind of umming and ahhing about these ‘The Problem With’ post titles, are they really problems or am I just falling into the click bait post title syndrome? Anyway I think social media is a wonderful thing, some people like various members of my family, not so much. I don’t know whether it’s because they don’t understand or don’t want to understand but to me I like social media, I get that’s sometimes it can be a bit all too much in your face and it doesn’t come without its negative sides but when people tell me that people spend too much time on their phones and not connecting with the real world I just get annoyed, not as much as I used to, now it’s more of a whatever eye roll than a seething rant about ignorance and people refusing to adapt.

My folk’s main argument is always about communication and that people don’t know how to communicate anymore, it’s impersonal, my argument is that the way people communicate hasn’t really changed, it’s just the format that’s changed. In the old days everyone just read a book or paper to hide on public transport, these days we have headphones and tablets. My parents always comment when we pull out phones to check stuff, asking if we’re talking to each other on our phones, I get they jest but in all honesty I’m getting bored with explaining that no I’m actually dealing with my business which pretty much solely depends on social media, I’m talking to friends halfway across the world because calling is so bloody expensive, or that I’m reading a very interesting article on something or that I’m actually interested in other people’s opinions on things regardless of whether you think that people should keep their opinions to themselves. So I stopped and these days I just nod and carry on. Some people don;t like change and that’s okay but I pretty much ted to find they are the first to complain when they are left behind. That is to also say that they are pretty much a minority, it just doesn’t seem that way because they tend to be the ones who shout the loudest.

You remember in the old days when you called abroad and you had to wait for that minute delay to hear what the other person said but now you switch on your phone and actually see the person you’re talking to? As the bridge generation between baby boomers and millennials I’m versed in both the old and new ways of communication, to me there are no real differences between the two aside what I said before it’s just the format that has changed. Apparently I’m not Gen X, I’m actually a Xennial but that’s a post for another time and I’m not sure I agree yet! It’s all digital the only real difference is that it’s more accessible and given more people a platform to express their views which like everything has it’s good and bad points. Naturally this does not apply to every person on either side of the generation gap, it actually only applies to the few which some how end up being what appears the voice of the majority.

I’ve made quite a few friends on social media, some I consider to be very good friends even though we’ve never met because the ways to communicate have broadened allowing you to share more. Like ‘in real life’ a term which I loathe to use but will for the purpose of this blog, some friendships never last, they fade over time as you grow and change and they only a serve a purpose for a small moment in time. I was reminded recently that people can be very deceptive and manipulative, being sweet and helpful to anyone they want something out of but never actually doing anything for anyone else. They used to only talk to me (crash into my DM box) when they wanted to vomit their problems or grievances somewhere. I felt a boundary was being crossed, especially as they never cared to say hello or ask out I was, it was all about how they were suffering which in all honesty they weren’t. Instead of them apologising for their behaviour, they told me they were sorry that I felt that way and blocked me! Serious to fuck! I guess that’s the easiest option and it’s not that different for IRL where someone would cut you out of their life when you pull them up on their shitty behaviour because in hindsight when reflecting over this very one-sided relationship, that is what narcissists do. I take very little comfort in knowing that they have done this to other people, and when their name crops up in conversations I can’t help but feel for their next potential roadkill as they hurtle down the superhighway on their quest for adoration and validation. I just hope they treat others better but rarely do these types of people learn from their mistakes, it’s always someone else’s fault.

I’m not saying it’s better I’m just saying it’s different and that’s the thing that people don’t seem to understand. I always hear from my parents that they had it better in their day but I disagree, it’s just different. For starters I have no physical comparison only words and to be honest as a woman I don’t think I would have had it better in the old days, for starters I would have had fewer choices and would have to depend more on others because you know as a women we can’t be trusted to have our bank accounts or other shit but no things were better in the old days, when everyone else had fewer choices and less rights.

Anyway I digress, something you’re all used to by now in these ramble posts, I actually read a post about someone stating that they won’t read your blog if the posts are too long, aside the fact the just admitted they can’t be bothered to read, blog snobbery is a whole other issue I could cover in another post, which I might. Social media is not the problem, people are the problem, I’m the problem, you’re the problem, everyone is the problem because of our differences. The problems will always exist regardless of the platform on which they are delivered for the simple fact that people exist. The problems won’t go away unless people change or cease to exist.