Seasons of Change

Pink camellia

It dawned on me that I’m very much in tune with the seasons, I move with them like the tide as each one rolls in and out. In the winter I tend to be me more sombre with an urgent desire to rest and recharge, the darker days make me want to hunker down and hibernate, I become less social and less productive.

In the spring I wake up, I welcome the return on the warming sun, enjoy the blossom and the earth waking up. There is the want to dye my hair a brighter colour, the darker, heavier clothes get put away, the lighter and greener foods return to my plate, flowers start filling my garden.

In the summer I embrace the bold colours and look forward to visiting the sea, in the autumn I am forever in awe of the beautiful colour that come before the darkness of winter sets in and we begin the cycle all over again.

Camellia

Humans never stop, we go against the grain, we are always pushing ourselves to hard, everything (in the western world least) is available at the push of a button, we never stop. A sense of urgency and it’s too late has been ingrained into us, the rules to success are

Maybe that’s why I never have a definitive style, I tune into my surroundings and my style and work reflect that and maybe that’s what I’ve been overlooking. I’ve been searching for a style and brand and it’s been there with me all the time, almost chameleonic  as I adapt to my surroundings.

Pink Camellia Bush

I get I’m sounding a little hippy witch right now but nature has always been my first source of inspiration and you know from previous posts that I feel very connected to nature but this isn’t just about that. To be honest I’m not really sure what it is about (what’s new?) All I know is that my work is about to take a different direction and I need to stop stalling, I need to let my work take it’s course and bloom, it’s not about trying to fit in or stand out, it’s just about trying to grow in what feels like a hostile environment.

When I look at the daily news, I know that I am grateful for what I have and sometimes my meanderings seem a little whiny and privileged, I get to wake up and be self-employed every day, I’m well taken of. I haven’t always been, so I fully appreciate when I am. I like my life and I’m happy, which is why it feels weird to always feel so overwhelmed and anxious over the smallest of things. Big things I can handle, small things not so much.

Camellia

Sometimes I think I should be more meaningful with this blog, give it a purpose, make it stand out as a voice amongst millions with something profound and important because I spent so much time and money on this blog, and then I remember that’s not why I’m here. I’m just here like many others because I can be, this will eventually be a place for to promote and sell my work which I’m not very good at, the more I try the further my stats and sales figures go down. I acknowledge that business and blogging is a rollercoaster, we are  the currently in a hurtling down phase but that’s not a reason to get dispondent or give up, it’s just the reason you need to take that leap of faith and try that thing you’ve always been meaning to do.

Photos by me.

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